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Author Topic: Revealing your Sexual History  (Read 317 times)

Aphrodite64

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Revealing your Sexual History
« on: September 21, 2001, 01:54:00 pm »
Shah is coming from a \"judging\" standpoint.  Notice he uses this information not to build an honest dialog, but rather to judge if the woman is \"worthy.\"  Immature attitudes like yours are why women know best that it is better to keep your lips sealed.

If a woman turned that little questionnaire on you, i.e,:
1. how many abortions have you contribute to?
2. how many women have you gave oral sex to?
3 .how many women have you slept with?
4.what type of sex acts have you been involved in?
5. What is your relationship w/ your mother like?
6. Have you ever had a one night stand?
7. Have you EVER had sex w/o a condom (you know y\'all lie BIG TIME on that one!!)
How honest would your answers be?  I know I have gotten \"canned\" answers, especially from number 5
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RUfeelinME

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Revealing your Sexual History
« Reply #1 on: September 22, 2001, 01:41:00 am »
Ladies I hope you don\'t get me wrong. I\'m not trying to judge anyone, that\'s the Lord\'s job.  I agree that woman are looked at differently if they had many partners. What I have a problem with, be it man or woman is being lied to or decieved.  If you are in a committed relationship I think you should be straight with that person from the gitty up. I\'m not talking numbers but you\'re sexual habits, unprotected sex, STD\'s, dangerous or unusual fetishes etc... Fine you like to get your freak on, I\'m a freak too. Just don\'t give off this perception of being a saint, then come to find out you are living a completely different life or something you\'ve done or like could endanger me. It may sound crazy but if some one I care about asked me some thing about my sexual past I would be honest, and I expect the same from my partner.  That may sound insecure to some people but that\'s just my point of view.
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Jaia

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Revealing your Sexual History
« Reply #2 on: September 20, 2001, 07:07:00 pm »
First, this thread attracted a lot of men. I wonder why that is? I like hearing from the men.
In my relationship, we are honest. Sometimes brutally honest but always tactful. Our relationship became sexual fairly quickly and I needed to know what his sexual history was. Not only because we were dating, but because I was curious. My curiosity sometimes hurts me. When the truth was revealed, I found out I had had more sexual partners than my fiancee. He was comfortbale with it and it opened tons of dialogue. Personally, when I tell the entire truth I feel I can breathe easier and be more truthful during sex.
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shah

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Revealing your Sexual History
« Reply #3 on: September 21, 2001, 01:20:00 pm »
once again i have been disappointed by the elder women, you complain about men lying but i guess you can throw that out the window now. when i meet a women i dont care who she is i ask!
 1. how many abortions have you had
2. how many men have you gave oral sex too
3 .how many men  have you slept with
4.what type of sex acts have you been involved in
5. do you have daddy issue
because of the sexual revolution and promiscuity among women i better know the things she has done so i can JUDGE for myself
if she is someone i want to be with . and all men should be told about a women exploits. we are in a shattered state of relationships because issues like this TELL THE TRUTH ! move to the next man if he doesnt except what you tell him, but let HIM DECIDE! oh yeah ! i am 29 .
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shah

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Revealing your Sexual History
« Reply #4 on: September 21, 2001, 01:21:00 pm »
once again i have been disappointed by the elder women, you complain about men lying but i guess you can throw that out the window now. when i meet a women i dont care who she is i ask!
 1. how many abortions have you had
2. how many men have you gave oral sex too
3 .how many men  have you slept with
4.what type of sex acts have you been involved in
5. do you have daddy issue
because of the sexual revolution and promiscuity among women i better know the things she has done so i can JUDGE for myself
if she is someone i want to be with . and all men should be told about a women exploits. we are in a shattered state of relationships because issues like this TELL THE TRUTH ! move to the next man if he doesnt except what you tell him, but let HIM DECIDE! oh yeah ! i am 29 .
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Starchild

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Revealing your Sexual History
« Reply #5 on: September 21, 2001, 05:16:00 pm »
If you\'re into judging one another, u have no business being in a relationship in the first place.  Recognize that (just about) everyone has a history, we have all done some dirt.  Knowing that, learn to recognize that if your woman wants to be with you, what she did before and with whom really doesn\'t matter much.  As a man, do u think about the women you\'ve been with in the past when you\'re with your woman?  Why would u think she\'s thinking about her past partners?  Assuming there are no health issues at stake, I really don\'t need to know all about your past.  I don\'t want to know, and I learned long ago not to ask a question I didn\'t want to know the answer to. That being said, if she (on her own accord) chooses to make an issue out of her past exploits--it is now open game.  But for real, if, for some reason I feel a need/desire to ask you about something in your past, I will be able to handle the answer...and I want the real answer because it will be some shyt if I discover that you lied to me about what I consider a simple question.
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Legacy

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Revealing your Sexual History
« Reply #6 on: September 22, 2001, 06:14:00 am »
Is it ok for da brotha\'s to post here? Hopefully I\'m not intruding. If I am, I’m dealing with sista’s so I am certain they will let me know!  
ALL
Here\'s a thought.
If you can\'t be honest about the number of people you slept with, performed oral sex on, etc then how about just keeping your pants up. I mean, if you don\'t want to be looked at as a **  (no gender intended - both men & women can be ** ’s) then don\'t sleep with so many people that you\'ll be either be embarrassed or afraid to tell the truth about it. I\'d say that\'s probably a much better solution than lying. I don\'t expect a woman to be Mother Teresa but I\'m not trying to shack up with Lil Kim either – LOL!! I mean, I\'m human just like anyone else so I don\'t want to come across as Rev. Jesse Jackson. (Uhm, oops! - LMAO! - bad example! - HAHA!) Anywayz, It\'s also important to look for growth in people & not hold a 30 year old in contempt for once being a sexually charged, spiritually & mentally immature teenager. Now, if they’re 45? Well, you might be able to break out with some Ludacris references - LOL
Having said that, both sexual history & lying can say a lot about your morals & character (or lack thereof) & that\'s important to know when entering into serious committed relationships. Personally, I wouldn’t want a woman whose had more sexual partners than the 2000 LA Lakers playoff point average but I sure could respect her more for being honest & telling me the truth. The betrayal of a lie completely destroys trust & the vast majority of relationships will not survive it.
Once a person has to question what you tell them, because of no other reason that a lie you told, forget it. It\'s all downhill from there.
Ya know, there’s something funny about the truth. It can compromise & limit you so much that you have little choice but to do the right (or more progressive) thing. We could all try to use the power of truth (w/ tact) in our own lives and interactions with others a little more.
“You cry keepin it real but you should try keepin it right” – De La Soul
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