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quote:Originally posted by Bo:
How would you have taken a comment like this?Trying not to be hypersensitive to potential racists or condescending comments, I\'m afraid my skin would have bristled a bit at the arrogance of that statement (or my perceived arrogance in this person assuming that phrase was part of my daily vernacular).  The Euro culture has been in my life (and I indoctrinated in it) since I was a child - through socialization, education, employment, etc., and after a while, one can just tell when a relatively innocuous statement really reflects the true character or belief of the individual.  Having been around this person, you would be a better judge of that than anyone on this board.
This whole thing reminds me of the 70\'s when I would hear white people slinging around phrases indicating that Blacks were such an \"emotional\" people.... that our reactions were so \"emotional!\"       Well, hell, suffer through injustice, blatant racism, plus a sundry of other inequities... and still be expected to walk around with a grin on your face and be \"better\" than them in order to compete on an \"equal\" playing field\".... it\'s no small wonder we AREN\'T always overly emotional.
I have been in such situations as this, Bo, and the way I handled it depended on the relationship I had with the offending party.  If that person were truly a friend, I would be open and direct and bring the inappropriateness of their comment to their attention.  If it was a business or social event, I would be less direct, but would somehow work in an equally \"innocuous\" comment (with a smile, of course) that put the shoe on the other foot.

....sidenote to Teelah... the reason Ms. HB closed your other thread is that you have a way of making topics to discuss general threads about you and your various scenarios.  Can you please stick to topic here?  Thanks[This message has been edited by MzSheel (edited 10-17-2001).]

quote:Originally posted by DianaPrince:
I think you just made a good case for why so many black folks ARE overly emotional....i.e...they constantly feel STRESSED and on edged That was the point .... that driven to the edge on the regular, ANYONE would be \"emotional\"

One last thing litte one. I\'m too old to salivate, none left from my youth. Now, I just be and they come. But you wouldn\'t understand that would you? You can only see what you have been told to look at. And you see, like most closed minded ignorant people, only stereotypes. Can\'t equate real life outside of the movies or t.v. huh?

Osiris,
You half witted old jackass!  Why dont your look up the meaning of the term self-sufficient, if you dont know what it means?  It generally means being able to provide for one\'s self.  A self sufficient woman is one who does not need a man to provide for her financially (and it is well documented that financial dependence is the reason many women remain in non-satisfying relationships).
I\'m not remotely interested in fitting YOUR definition of a \"real woman\"...the eternally suffering martyr, who must live a life misery from birth to death, all so that WEAK ass BM like YOU can feel like you still have dominion over someone/something.
As for the rest of your foul mouthed response, I\'d tell you to kiss my black ass, if not for 1..The thought of your crusty old, apple sauce eating, dentures being any where near me would make me vomit, 2..I was brought up to be a lady.
And regarding your self-serving bull shyt about women young enough to be your daughter, being romantically attracted to your spirit....yeah, so aren\'t all the multitude of single women your own age attracted to this great spirit of yours?  And since you like to consider yourself so in tune with NATURE, do you think that nature intended for women your own age, ya know, like your son\'s mother, to remain alone, while nasty old men like your prey on young women who s/b with a man their own age, building a family of their own.  What if one of these young women who you like to take advantage of, gets knocked up by you?...dont you know that your crusty old ass will likely be a vegetable while that child is still young, and that you will likely be dead b4 that child reach age 30?  Thats hardly what NATURE intended!
As for the poem, you are right, it didn\'t resonate with me b/c it was long drowned out by the loud resonance of your posts above it.

quote:Originally posted by Bo:
.....For example, after my wife and I returned from the dance floor, he greeted us with a \"you guys were keeping it real\" comment.  But it sounded stupid coming out of his mouth.  I didn\'t know whether to be insulted, offended, or to take it as another stupid way white people try to endear themselves to blacks.  At the least I thought it was patronizing!  At first I was put off by it -- especially because we don\'t even talk like that.  And I wasn\'t sure if he was mocking.  Then I thought well maybe he\'s just trying to be freindly and that I may be a little more sensitive because we were only two of the few blacks there!
How would you have taken a comment like this?
[This message has been edited by Bo (edited 10-09-2001).]
Bo,
I know what you mean but I would not let it bother me nor would I allow it to spoil my enjoyment of the occasion (wedding).
However (and I don\'t think this is off-topic) I had a situation while back where a Black female co-worker was let go.  She and I sat near each other and interacted for business for about a month, but we never socialized or even went to lunch together.  Now - this is an investment firm - and the only other minority is an Asian guy.  Anyway, since she was let go a few months ago, I\'ve received several inquiries from White co-workers...\"Have you heard from XXX\"?...(No, should I have?  There is no reason for her to contact me.)  \"Oh, I thought you two were friends.  Just wondered how she was doing.  It was such a shame she was let go.\"  Kinda honks me off for 2 reasons: 1 - the assumption that 2 BW who happen to work in the same office (of about 60 people) have to be tight/close friends. 2 - If THEY are so concerned about her, why don\'t THEY call her up?
But in your case I truly think the guy was trying to be \"down\" ...friendly.  Would I have been annoyed?  Probably, especially since I don\'t talk that way either.  But reading it here I\'m picturing the scene.  Kind of amusing.    
[This message has been edited by kam514 (edited 10-20-2001).]